title: not him 1/1
pairing: cyclops/wolverine, cyclops/angel implied
rating: pg-13
warnings: language, angst
disclaimer: not mine. no harm intended. no profit made. for entertainment
purposes only.
feedback: yes, hit me! harder!
beta: shel & frogg. thank you luvs!
archive: tddm, my lj, poisonsdarkfics only.
summary: warren tries to talk some sense into logan. good luck!
A/N: I was reading a great C/W series recently in which things didn't go too well for logan and scott. served me the bunny for this one (o:
~o0o~
He was good. Warren had to give him that. It had taken him almost a week to finally find him in the Canadian wilderness, and that only because he had asked the right questions and the right people. About a loner, on a motorcycle, smoking cigars and wearing a distinctive jacket. He had shown pictures around and though he was clearly recognisable as a mutant with his wings and blue skin, people had been almost friendly and more than helpful. Might as well be who he was beneath the mutation, the heir of the Worthington emporium, and people were always reacting in a certain predictable way when they saw money. And Warren reeked of money.
He had almost given up on finding Logan in the vast land of Canada when he had met a stocky bald bartender who had pointed him into the direction he had seen a guy meeting Warren's description heading off. It hadn't taken him long after that to find Scott's motorcycle which Logan had again 'borrowed'. Somehow, Warren didn't believe that Logan had intended to return it this time.
He landed beside the vehicle and touched the tank; it was still warm. Logan couldn't be off too far, he reckoned. He looked around if he would find any traces Logan had left. He smiled. Logan had left a visible trace through the snow and trees. Warren started to follow the track, alert and half-expecting Logan to jump him from behind the next tree.
Finally, he reached a clearing which opened to reveal a magnificent view of a lake in the middle of the forest. Under different circumstances, Warren would have taken the time to pause and appreciate the beauty that was unfolding in front of his eyes. He sighed quietly. He had no time for this. Not now. Maybe he would come back some day to enjoy the tranquillity of this place. But for now, he had something else to do. He had, after all, come here for a reason.
It only took a look in the right direction to spot Logan sitting at the shore of the lake, smoking a cigar and drinking a beer. Warren walked the path down towards Logan, not bothering with stealth or discretion. He supposed that Logan had known he was here the moment he entered the clearing, maybe even earlier. Thus, it didn't surprise Warren that Logan didn't even turn around to look who stood behind him.
"Hello, Logan."
"What do you want, bird-boy?"
"Talk. I think we should talk."
Logan snorted. "There's nothing I want to talk about. Least of all *you*!"
"Then, perhaps, you want to listen."
"To you? You must be fucking kidding me. - Look, why don't you just fly home, go back to your lover and leave me the fuck alone?"
"I want to talk to you about Scott."
"But I don't want to talk about him. There's nothing left to say."
"That's where you're wrong. - Mind if I sit down?"
"Last time I looked this was a free country."
Warren rolled his eyes, but he held his tongue and sat down instead. "When will you come home?"
"Home? I don't have a home that I can go to. - Want one?" he asked, holding a bottle towards Warren.
"Thanks." Warren popped the cap and took a long sip. "You're still welcome, you know? We miss you. *He* misses you."
"Not very likely. He couldn't get far enough away from me the last time we talked."
"That may be because you weren't talking but breaking up. Nonetheless-- He misses you. He still loves you."
"Tell yourself another one, Angel. If he loved me he wouldn't have broken up with me in the first place and crawled into your bed."
"You're missing the point."
"There was one?" Logan sighed. "Look, I really don't want to talk about this. It's over and done with. We broke up. I left. End of the story."
"Tell me, then, why did you take his bike again if you're over and done with him? Tell me why he can't forget you. Tell me why he still moans your name when he comes. If you don't know that he loves you you're a bigger idiot than I thought."
Logan growled. "Did you come here to insult me, Wings?"
"I came here to talk some sense into you. You might not see it like that but I can't give Scott what he needs. I'm not you and I never will be. He needs you."
"Why, then, was the first thing he did, after we fought and broke up, run to you?"
"Hell, Logan, I don't know!" Warren got up on his feet again. "All I know is that Scott's not the same since you left. He's like a shadow. Functioning, yes, but not living. I thought I could help him. I thought I could give him what he needs. And I would lie if I said that coming here wasn't the fucking hardest thing I ever did. But Scott doesn't want stability. He doesn't want red roses and courtship. He doesn't need a lover he doesn't have to fight for. No matter how much he tries to tell himself otherwise. What he needs is something I can't give him. And that's you."
"And what do you suggest I should do, hmm? Go back? Pretend that nothing has happened? Take his shit every time he thinks he needs to diss me because he can't handle who and what I am? Should I wait for him in the night when he's too busy and too engrossed in his work to even come to our room to sleep? Too full of himself to even tell me that he'll stay up late? I thought I could deal with everything he throws at me. But not lately, Wings. I'm not just a bed warmer. I need more than that. I need to be more than a fucking secret he's afraid of anybody finding out."
"You really do love him, don't you?"
"If you repeat that to anyone--"
"I won't. But it's good to know." Warren turned away and looked over the lake. This was much more difficult than he had thought. He had thought that two months were enough to even cool down The Wolverine. Obviously, he had been mistaken. "How long do you plan to run?"
"I'm not running. I'm making a clean cut."
"Of course you are. That's why you took his bike in the first place." Warren couldn't help the sarcasm in his voice; Logan was testing his patience to the maximum.
Logan extended his claws. "Your time's up, Wings. Go home to your boyfriend and leave me alone."
Warren wrung his hands. "You just don't get it do you? Hell, you two must be the two most stubborn beings in this fucking universe!"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"I had a similar conversation with Scott before I went after you. He was talking crap like that you don't want him anymore and that he's the biggest idiot alive for letting you go. But would he go after you? No. Because he's too fucking stubborn to admit that he needs and loves you."
"And you're expecting me to come back to him *again*? If he loves me as much as you're claiming he does, he can come fucking after me."
"Isn't it enough for you to know that he's suffering?"
"I'm afraid, no."
"Doesn't this mean anything to you? Do you enjoy knowing that he's hurting?"
"Now, that's enough, Warren! Of course I'm not enjoying this. Don't you think it's fucking hard for me, too? The past six months were the best time I've had in my whole fucking life! But there's only so much I can take. Cyke overstepped the boundary, and we both have to pay the price. It's called life, you know?"
"Fuck you, Logan! You know, maybe you're right. Maybe it was a mistake coming here. I thought you'd care more about him. But obviously you don't."
"Why don't you just fly home to him, then, since you're the one who fucking cares?"
"Because I'm not you! I could give him everything and nothing he wants and it still wouldn't be enough. I still won't be you. If you can get that into your head, you know where to find him." Without another word, Warren spread his wings and ascended into the sky, leaving Logan to mull over what he had said. If he had listened at all, that is. Warren wasn't so sure about that. Talking sense into a sulking Wolverine was just as expedient as trying to reason with any other inanimate object. Only that Logan wasn't exactly an inanimate object though the dispassion he had spoken with earlier strongly suggested otherwise.
Warren sighed. It was useless to brood over the conversation with Logan. He had done his part. Now it was up to Logan to keep running away or come back home, and Warren honestly hoped it would be the latter one in the end.
~o0o~
Logan took a deep breath, taking in the familiar aura of the school. A lot of new smells have added to the mix since he had last been here four month ago, but the basic scent was still the same and made him feel at ease, relaxed even.
It had taken him one month to finally admit to himself that parts, if not all, of what Warren had said was right. And another one to push him past caring if Scott still wanted him around or not. He needed to see him, and he hated Scott for reducing him to this state. Logan had always been comfortable on his own, had never needed anything or anyone. Scott had changed that on an elementary basis, and Logan loathed himself for giving in.
He pondered shortly if he should make a detour to his room - their room - to drop his bag before he went to see Charles, but he decided that he'd rather do it now than later.
He raised his hand to knock at Charles' office, but he already heard the soft invitation to enter in his mind. Damn telepath! He entered the office and halted. He hadn't expected Scott to be here and in uniform, too. "Is there a problem?" he asked immediately since Scott only was in uniform when there was a crisis.
However, he didn't hear the answer of the professor because he suddenly found his arms full of Scott, the legs and arms of the other man securely wrapped around his waist and neck. "You're back," Scott whispered. "You're finally back. I was so scared I'd never see you again. I was about to go after you and do everything to get you back. Never leave me again, promise. I love you, Logan. Gods, I missed you so much..."
Logan looked at the man in his arms and smirked. "Who the fuck are you and what have you done with Scott Summers?"
Scott blushed and looked down. "I guess I deserved that, didn't I?"
"Yeah, you did. Don't expect to be forgiven so easily."
"I know."
Charles cleared his throat. "Gentlemen, maybe you want to continue this conversation in a more--private setting."
"Sorry, Professor."
Logan moved to set Scott down on his feet again, but Scott tightened his thighs. "Don't you dare put me down."
Logan quirked his brows. "What happened to *secrecy* and *discretion*?"
"Fuck secrecy and discretion. I have nothing to hide. You're not my dirty secret, Logan. Not--not anymore. Never again."
"Fair enough. - If you would excuse us, Professor..." Logan opened the door with one hand, the other arm wrapped tightly around Scott. "Where do you wanna go?"
"Our room," Scott mumbled.
"Very well." Logan smirked at the people in the hall that happened to cross their path, quite aware of what it meant that Scott had insisted on being carried to their room. There wouldn't be any secrets anymore. No secret trysts, no discreet touches when Scott thought no one was looking. No more secrecy and no more discretion. Logan could live with that.
~o0o~
Warren smiled sadly when Logan carried Scott past him, to their room without any doubt. It was better this way. He just hadn't been the one for Scott. Nor had Jean. But Logan was the one for him. About that, he didn't have any doubts.
"Though I know they're right for each other and I should be happy for them, it kind of breaks my heart to see them like this," Bobby said quietly.
"I know what you mean. Still, it's better this way. Scott and I would've never worked out. I'm--just not him."
Bobby nodded. "Hey, Warren. Want to go out tonight for a beer or two?"
Warren grinned. "You know, that sounds like a plan."
"What are we waiting for then? Let's go!"
~o0o~
the end.